Let’s be completely honest for a moment. Unless you make a living walking down haute couture runways, the thought of standing in front of a professional camera for hours on your wedding day can feel incredibly intimidating.
As a wedding photographer with 25 years of experience, I hear the same worries all the time:
“I always feel so stiff and unnatural.”
“I absolutely hate how I look in photos.”
“I’m a bigger person, and I’m terrified of looking bad or being posed uncomfortably.”
If any of these thoughts have crossed your mind, I want you to take a deep, relaxing breath. I get it. Truly.
As a bigger girl myself, I am hyper-aware of how a shooting style can affect someone’s confidence. I approach my work with the utmost respect, care, and body-positive awareness.
I’m also a bit of a goof! My mission isn’t just to take your picture; it’s to help you drop your guard, relax, and be exactly who you are.
Here is how we turn “awkward” into absolute magic.
Many people think great wedding photos come from holding a perfect, rigid pose. But that’s exactly what makes you feel like a statue. My secret sauce is a technique I call posed-unposed styling.
Instead of freezing you in place, I choreograph a loose movement or a fun setup. I might ask you to whisper something ridiculous in your partner’s ear or play a quick game of tag while holding hands.
The real magic? It almost always happens after the pose.
The moment the “exercise” is over, you both burst into genuine laughter. Your shoulders drop. You look at each other with pure affection.
That split second of real, authentic connection is what I’m actually waiting to capture.
Even with the best guidance, you might still catch yourself feeling a little tense. If you feel an “awkward wave” coming on during your portrait session, here are four quick psychological and physical resets to help you get back on track.
When we feel nervous, we tend to hold our breath and shrug our shoulders upward, which creates a tense, stiff look.
The Correction:
Look away from the camera, take a deep breath, and let it out with a loud sigh. Let your jaw relax and intentionally drop your shoulders.
Nothing screams “awkward” louder than not knowing what to do with your hands. They either hang like limp noodles or bunch up into tight fists.
The Correction:
Always keep your hands occupied with touch. Slide a hand into your pocket, gently rest your fingertips on your partner’s lapel, play with your veil, or wrap your arms loosely around their waist.
Movement helps eliminate stiffness.
If staring at a glass lens makes your eyes glaze over into a forced, fake smile, stop looking at it.
The Correction:
Turn your eyes entirely to your partner. Trace their jawline with your eyes, look at their hands, or pick a spot on their collar.
By changing your focal point to the person you love, your facial expressions will soften and become more genuine.
If you feel a fake, rigid smile locked onto your face, your facial muscles may be experiencing fatigue from tension.
The Correction:
Call a 10-second timeout. Turn around, shake out your arms and legs, wiggle your jaw, and make a silly face.
Breaking the serious mood for just a moment can help you relax and reset.
Your wedding day is a celebration of love, not a grueling modeling test. You don’t need to know your “best angles” or worry about your size—that is entirely my job, and it’s a job I’ve spent two and a half decades mastering.
When you look back at your wedding album, I don’t want you to remember being told to “stand straight and smile.” I want you to look at those pictures and remember the laughs, the goofiness, and how incredibly happy you felt being yourself.
Your wedding day is a celebration of your love story, not a stressful modeling test. You don’t need to worry about being “photogenic,” knowing your angles, or feeling self-conscious about your body—that is entirely my job, and it’s a job I’ve spent 25 years perfecting right here in Southern California.
If you’re ready to shake off the camera nerves, share some real laughs, and get wedding photos you’ll absolutely love looking at for the rest of your life, I would love to chat.
Connect with Sarah Jane Hardt Photography to see if your wedding date is available!
Let’s make some magic together in Los Angeles—or anywhere in the world!
